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Psychological Debt


 articles

Marketing

Psychological Debt

by Tim Connor



Over 30 years ago when I was failing in my first sales position and was struggling every step of the way, I had an important mentor in my life who gave me the most valuable insight I have ever gained in my entire sales career. Here is a very condensed version of a conversation that took place in the early 60s.

"Larry, I don't understand it. Everyone I give a presentation to tells me how good I am, how knowledgeable I am, and how successful they believe I will be in selling. But they still don't buy."

"Tim, you are experiencing what I call Psychological debt."

"What's that?"

"During a presentation you do a lot for a prospect. You give them your time, energy, the benefits of your insight, wisdom and experience. You are nice to them and you educate them. In other words, you do a great deal for them in the span of an hour or so."

"What's your point, Larry?"

"A little impatient, aren't we? You see you have done a lot for them and they feel they owe you, psychologically, that is. And they don't want you leaving, owing you and they don't want to buy for whatever reason, so they give you a compliment. Once you accept the compliment, the debt is paid and now you can leave without an order, but supposedly feeling good about yourself because of the compliment. Problem is, sooner or later with lots of compliments and no sales, you will starve – you'll feel good, but you will be broke."

"So what do I do?"

"It's simple. When you get an order and a compliment, say thank you. When you get a compliment instead of an order refuse the compliment. The debt still exists. Here's how: Bob, if I were that good at what I do, we would be doing business together today, and since we are not I'm afraid I don't deserve that compliment."

"Tim, younger and new salespeople tend to have a problem with this issue. Since they are new they have a need for validation. When they get it, it strokes their ego, need for acceptance and makes them feel O.K. Problem is, if they don't deal with it successfully, they will fail. You can't pay your mortgage with compliments."

I haven't seen Larry in over 35 years, but his advice has helped me avoid losing hundreds of sales during my career. Thanks, Larry – wherever you are.


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Tim Connor, CSP, is a professional speaker and expert in the fields of management, sales, team building, and customer service. He's the author of 19 books and can be reached at 704-895-1230, speaker@bellsouth.net or www.timconnor.com.




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