Attracting Your Ideal Client

Marketing

Attracting Your Ideal Client
by Linda Talley



Attraction is a natural phenomenon. Unfortunately, we often ignore the attraction principle, instead seducing others to get what we want—sales, friends, results. Seduction has become such a way of life that we may think we are attracting people—even when we're not. A key indicator for seduction: if you continuously go out of your way to get more, you're probably using seduction rather than attraction.

Seduction is telling someone what a good salesperson or consultant you are; attraction is simply delivering the product or service in the most extraordinary way. Seductive selling is telling a prospect what a great product or service you have. The attraction method would be to ask permission and then demonstrate the product or service. Seduction is describing all the product or service features; attraction makes the prospect the focus of the conversation by saying, "You're someone who sees value in our service," or "You're someone who understands simplicity."

Whenever you talk about "what" or "it," you're trying to convince someone to do something and that's seduction. There's nothing wrong with seduction; it's one of the factors of a healthy economy. But it's also more stressful for both the buyer and seller.

There is a way to lessen stress and move from seduction to finding clients who are naturally attracted to you. Here are three steps to start the process:

Be three times more interested than interesting. Being interested is natural and being interesting is seductive. Be like a child in wonderment about the people and events around you. There's no judging, only fascination and interest. For every open-ended question asked of you, ask three open-ended questions. That makes you more interested than interesting.

Use attention-grabbing conversation starters. Instead of the usual, "Hi, how are you?" start a conversation with a comment or question that focuses on "who" the person is rather than "what" the person is doing. "You're the first person I've seen who's smart enough to wear comfortable walking shoes in here." "Do you always smile naturally or are you just overwhelmed with the convention?" "You look like you're a Texan, is that true? Even "Hi, Susan" is a great attention-grabber, since people love to hear their name.

When you can grab someone's attention and get that person off automatic pilot, you connect with them at the heart level. As long as they are in their head (ego), nothing is going to seem very attractive to them.

Develop a reputation as someone who cares. One way to show that you care is wanting a lot for someone—perhaps even more than they want for themselves—and sharing that thought with them.

To master this skill, make and memorize a list of up to 10 things you want for people such as business contacts, new clients, more friends, cherished loved ones, etc. Then begin using those things in your conversations. You'll be amazed at how the dynamics of your relationships with these people change. Here are some examples:

What I want for you is to be surrounded by people who love you, care for you and support you.

What I want for you is to run your computer rather than your computer running you.

What I want for you is to have financial security even if you can't work.

What I want for you is to have three more clients than you really need.

What I want for you is to stop struggling.

When you talk about wanting for someone, it makes you very attractive. You don't need the person to have it because then it would be more about you. It's not about doing it for them or helping them to get it. It's about the gift of sharing your hopes for them with "no strings attached."

Attraction is a natural phenomenon. You don't have to force a plant to grow, why force clients to move toward you when you can attract them?


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Linda Talley is a Houston-based executive coach, speaker and author of Business Finesse: Dealing With Sticky Situations in the Workplace for Managers and The Daily Win-Building Success One Step at a Time. 800-856-6607 linda@lindatalley.com www.lindatalley